Its such a weird feeling. It just came to my mind. Life always comes round a full circle. A time not so long ago I was living in the home provided by my dad, eating the food he bought from the money he earned. I was the one waiting for him to come back from work and spend time with me. Now, last Friday the same thing happened in reverse. I don't know how he must have felt. For the first time coming to the home of his son. Having the food he earned and made for him and waiting for him to come back from work/college. It must have made him nostalgic.
Well I did see him in flesh and blood after a good 10 or so months.Its weird that no matter how much you talk to someone on webcam chat etc, they still look so different in real. Its like I had this image frozen in time in my mind and when I met him again, I was comparing him to that same image in my head trying to look at any discernible changes. He looks older, his hair a bit more whiter.I'm sure when I go back home I'll notice all these changes in my siblings especially my youngest sister as she is that growing age. I'm missing her growing up. I wish I could have been there. Ahh!!! First ever roza without pakoras..As the great Ghalib rightly put it "Hazaron khwaishain aisi keh har khwaish pe dam nikle"...That is the basic dilemma of humans. Too many desires, too many expectations...And in the end dam unhi khwaishon par nikalta hai which aren't realized...Anyhooo, its time you guys get to read the full ghazal by Ghalib, not the abbreviated one sung by Jagjit:
Hazaaron khwahishen aisi ke har khwahish pe dam nikle
Bohat niklay mere armaan, lekin phir bhi kam nikle
Daray kyon mera qaatil? kya rahega us ki gardan par?
Voh khoon, jo chashm-e-tar se umr bhar yoon dam-ba-dam nikle
Daray kyon mera qaatil? kya rahega us ki gardan par?
Voh khoon, jo chashm-e-tar se umr bhar yoon dam-ba-dam nikle
Nikalna khuld se aadam ka soonte aaye hain lekin
Bahot be-aabru hokar tere kooche se hum nikle
Bharam khul jaaye zaalim! teri qaamat ki daraazi ka
Agar is tarahe par pech-o-kham ka pech-o-kham nikle
Magar likhvaaye koi usko khat, to hum se likhvaaye
Hui subaha, aur ghar se kaan par rakh kar qalam nikle
Hui is daur mein mansoob mujh se baada aashaami
Phir aaya voh zamaana, jo jahaan mein jaam-e-jaam nikle
Hui jin se tavaqqa khastagi ki daad paane ki
Voh ham se bhi zyaada khasta e tegh e sitam nikle
Mohabbat mein nahin hai farq jeenay aur marnay ka
Usi ko dekh kar jeetay hain, jis kaafir pe dam nikle
Zara kar jor seene par ki teer-e-pursitam niklejo
Wo nikle to dil nikle, jo dil nikle to dam nikle
Khuda ke waaste parda na kaabe se uthaa zaalim
Kaheen aisa na ho yaan bhi wahi kaafir sanam nikle
Kahaan maikhane ka darwaaza Ghalib aur kahaan vaaiz
Par itna jaantay hain kal voh jaata tha ke ham nikle
Hazaaron khwahishen aisi ke har khwahish pe dam nikle
Bohat niklay mere armaan, lekin phir bhi kam nikle...
TRANSLATION-
Thousands of desires, each worth dying for...
many of them I have realized...yet I yearn for more...
Why should my killer (lover) be afraid? No one will hold her responsible
for the blood which will continuously flow through my eyes all my life
We have heard about the dismissal of Adam from Heaven,
With a more humiliation, I am leaving the street on which you live...
Oh tyrant, your true personality will be known to all
if the curls of my hair slip through my turban!
But if someone wants to write her a letter, they can ask me,
every morning I leave my house with my pen on my ear.
In that age, I turned to drinking (alcohol)
and then the time came when my entire world was occupied by alcohol
From whom I expected justice/praise for my weakness
turned out to be more injured with the same cruel sword
When in love, there is little difference between life and death
we live by looking at the infidel who we are willing to die for
Put some pressure on your heart to remove that cruel arrow,
for if the arrow comes out, so will your heart...and your life.
For god's sake, don't lift the cover off any secrets you tyrant
the infidel might turn out to be my lover!
The preacher and the bar's entrance are way apart
yet I saw him entering the bar as I was leaving!
thousands of desires, each worth dying for...
many of them I have realized...yet I yearn for more
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